Can't Erase It

Jars of Clay, the band from Greenville, Illinois, has a song entitled “Can’t Erase It” on the If I Left the Zoo album. The lyrics are written below. It is a song that captures the angst of trying to be one thing when we know we should be something else. Read the lyrics, listen to the song, and read some thoughts about the song below.

Can’t Erase It

Follow the crowd and love everybody now
'Cause love is the best thing for you now
But you changed your mind you let everybody down
But down is the best place for you
It's easier that way you know it's

So wrong can't embrace it
wish sometimes for any other you
But you can't erase it and you won't escape it

Don't waste your time
Your words only confine you
To all of the things you've buried now
Don't ask them why
Their wisdom will leave you blind

But blind is the best thing for you
It's easier I know, you know it's

So wrong, can't embrace it
Wish sometimes for any other you
But you can't erase it, and you won't escape it

How long will you face it
Till the weight comes crashing down on you
'Cause you can't erase it, and you won't escape it

Songwriters: Charlie Lowell / Dan Haseltine / Matt Odmark / Stephen Daniel Mason

Can't Erase It lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, Capitol Christian Music Group

Dan Haseltine, in an interview once said that this song is "About fighting our deepest desire to be who we are not." Why do we have such a strong desire to be something we are not? Because we want to fit in with the majority and just like when we were in high school, we have this strong desire to fit in with the cool kids.

There are many things that can get in the way of being who God has made us to be. The majority culture says, “You don’t need God, just 'follow the crowd and love everybody.'” We hear this very regularly on our various media sources and we begin to believe that this is the way to live. But it is easy to change our mind and not really want to “love everybody.” It is truly hard to simply boost ourselves up to a level where we can love everybody. Bitterness and anger are the result. On our own we cannot love everybody.

If we follow the crowd, we are not being who we truly are. We are conforming to the image of what the crowd thinks we should be. If we follow the crowd, we will do things that we know are “so wrong” and we just won’t be able to embrace that they are right. We can’t erase the things we’ve done. We can’t escape the weight of going against God and against who he has made us to be. But there is one who can “erase it.” God says, “Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool” (Isaiah 1:18). Furthermore, “… his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth. He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west” (Psalm 103:11, 12). Jesus’ death on the cross was the ultimate way for him to remove the weight of sin and erase our wrong doings: “This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins” (Matthew 26:28).

If we bury the wrongs, ignore the wrongs, or embrace the wrongs, the weight will crush us. Instead we must acknowledge and confess and receive release from the weight.

Attitude

I went for a run yesterday and as it had been a few days since I had been out on the streets of Calgary, my muscles were complaining and suggesting that I was not going to make the full distance I had set out to achieve. I soon recognized this for what it was, a psychological battle. I did not need to convince my muscles, lungs, or heart that they should go on for the full distance, I had to convince my mind. There were several places where I was tempted to cut the run short by taking a path that would get me home sooner. It was not until I had passed the last such short-cut that I found myself relaxing and enjoying the day. When I arrived back at home, I was pleasantly surprised to find that I had achieved my goals for both distance and speed.

Convincing oneself to keep on running the full distance is a relatively easy task, but it is a helpful metaphor for the challenges of life. Thomas Jefferson said, "Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude."1 The author of Hebrews wrote, "let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us . . ."2 This day, I will run with endurance and in all things I will seek a right attitude.

1 http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/t/thomasjeff120994.html#k3Ps1Lm6bXMqHqQp.99
2 Hebrews 12:1,2

This Journey

Together we traveled on paths of beauty. The stars were purest white, the leaves greener than we had ever known, and the rivers brimmed with life. The hills spoke of old battles fought and new battles to come; we traveled through old forests inhabited by creatures both fair and foul. Sometimes the road was straight and true; other times it was obscured by fog, by dust, or by our own sense of loathing. At times, the trees echoed with laughter, fair languages, and song; at other times we heard guttural phrases, taunting laughter, and scratches in the recesses of the woods. Yet, the weapons of the King never failed us. Oh yes there were times when I was deceived by wicked creatures in angel robes. I should have taken up arms against these deceivers. But it was then that I was most glad for the King's regiment which always prevailed.

Now, the road behind is longer than the road in front; we have entered into the territory of the enemy. Soon we must storm the gates of the great stronghold. Now, is the time when we must be most diligent, most alert, most nimble, and most prepared to use the weapons entrusted to us. The stakes are high. We must not let down our guard. For the joy set before us, we press on!

Flight Behaviour

I just finished reading Barbara Kingsolver's latest novel, Flight Behavior. As usual, this Kingsolver book is about the concept of "home." In this particular narrative, she speaks of the tenuous nature of the "home." She weaves a story that describes the tension between the draw toward home and the desire to fly away to something else. If we are honest with ourselves, we have all experienced this tension. We build ourselves a warm and cozy life only to find ourselves just a little bored and wondering what someone else's life is like. I am convinced that this partly explains the tremendous popularity of movies and other forms of entertainment. They briefly allow us to escape and immerse ourselves in the other life.

Along with the tension of home versus flight, the author looks at "conformity" versus "difference." In one scene, we find the protagonist, Dellarobia, considering her son, Preston, her boss, Ovid Byron, and her best friend, Dovey.

[Preston's] earnest expression and level brow moved Dellarobia to a second sight: Preston would go far. Maybe he'd be a vet, farmers were crying for them around here. Or even the kind of vet that looks after elephants in zoos. For all her worry about his lack of advantages, Preston would be like Ovid Byron. Already he seemed set apart by a devotion to his own pursuits that was brave and unconforming. People were rarely like that, despite universally stated intentions. Most were like herself and Dovey, the one-time rebel girls with their big plans to fly out of here. Her boldness had been confined to such tiny quarters, it counted for about as much as mouse turds in a cookie jar. . . . But here sat her lionhearted son. Maybe it wasn't a decision, something drawn from the soup of birth. A lightning strike.1

Kingsolver shows great depth of knowledge of the human spirit. She tells of Preston, a boy who is "set apart by a devotion to his own pursuits that was brave and unconforming;" and then points out that people are rarely like that. Oh sure, the universally stated intention is that people want to be different from the crowd, but the fact is, most conform to the crowd. That's what makes it the crowd.

How important is conformity or non-conformity? Is this part of our desire to find a comfortable home? If we "fit in," things can be more comfortable for a time; but, what happens when we start to think for ourselves; what happens when we diverge from the herd? I must ask myself, "In what ways do I conform?" "In what ways do I diverge?" "How much am I truly thinking for myself?" These are large philosophical, ethical, theological, and lifestyle questions. Barbara Kingsolver has been successful in drawing me into reflection upon these questions. That is the value of a good book.

1 (Kingsolver 2012, 265, 266)

Work Cited:
Kingsolver, Barbara. Flight Behavior. Toronto: Harper Perennial, 2012.

People and the Kingdom of God

“You can’t lay down any pattern for God. There are many different ways of bringing people into his Kingdom, even some ways that I specially dislike! I have therefore learned to be cautious in my judgment."

“But we can block it in many ways. As Christians we are tempted to make unnecessary concessions to those outside the faith. We give in too much. Now, I don’t mean that we should run the risk of making a nuisance of ourselves by witnessing at improper times, but there comes a time when we must show that we disagree. We must show our Christian colors, if we are to be true to Jesus Christ. We cannot remain silent or concede everything away."

“There is a character in one of my children’s stories named Aslan, who says, ‘I never tell anyone any story except his own.’ I cannot speak for the way God deals with others; I only know how he deals with me personally. Of course, we are to pray for spiritual awakening, and in various ways we can do something toward it. But we must remember that neither Paul nor Apollos gives the increase. As Charles Williams once said, ‘The altar must often be built in one place so that the fire may come down in another place.’” C.S. Lewis

These words from C.S. Lewis are taken from Decision magazine, September 1963; © 1963 Billy Graham Evangelistic Association.  The article can be found online at http://www.cbn.com/special/Narnia/articles/ans_LewisLastInterviewA.aspx

Imaginative Meditations

Meditations upon
Matthew 26:7-16, Mark 14:3-11, John 12:1-8, and Luke7:36-50.

In these descriptions of four very similar events, we see that John emphasizes the fact that Mary was at the feet of Jesus. On the other hand, Matthew and Mark emphasize the anointing of Jesus' head as with the anointing of a king. Most scholars agree that Luke describes a different event with a different woman. I can imagine a conversation between Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John in heaven.

Matthew says to John, "Hey I really like what you did with your account of Mary anointing Jesus."

"Oh yeah, thanks, you know how it is, inspiration of the Holy Spirit."

Mark chimes in with, "Yeah, John, but you really emphasized the bit about Mary always being at the feet of Jesus. I wish I had thought of that. We all saw her anoint his head but you also brought out her humility in stooping down, anointing his feet, and wiping them with her hair."

John replies, "Yeah, I guess that is how I always saw her. She was at Jesus' feet when he was teaching. She fell at his feet when he came to raise Lazarus. And then she poured perfume on his feet and made quite a spectacle of herself with her long hair."

At which point, Luke breaks into the conversation and says, "Yeah, she looked a lot like that other woman who wiped Jesus' feet with her tears. I mentioned her in my gospel record, you know."

Matthew, Mark, and John chuckle at the doctor and Mark says, "Yeah, good connection Luke."

John adds, "All those feelings of unworthiness and sorrow wrapped up in both of those events."

Matthew looks over at the Holy Spirit and says, "Wow, talk about divine inspiration!"

Love someone who does not deserve it

"Manifesto: The Mad FarmerLiberation Front" by Wendell Berry

So, friends, every day do something
that won't compute. Love the Lord.
Love the world. Work for nothing.
Take all that you have and be poor.
Love someone who does not deserve it.
Because this is a vision of life that embraces humility and patience,

Give your approval to all you cannot
understand. Praise ignorance, for what man
has not encountered he has not destroyed.
Ask the questions that have no answers.
Invest in the millenium. Plant sequoias.
Say that your main crop is the forest
that you did not plant,
that you will not live to harvest.
Say that the leaves are to be harvested
when they have rotted into the mold.
Call that profit. Prophesy such returns.*

* Wendell Berry, "Manifesto: The Mad FarmerLiberation Front," in The Selected Poems of Wendell Berry (Washington, D.C.: Counterpoint, 1998), pp. 87-88. As quoted in Walsh, Brian J. and Keesmaat, Sylvia C., Colossians Remixed: Subverting the Empire (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 2004), p. 178. See the entire Wendell Berry Poem here.

Imagination

. . . we agree with Walter Brueggemann’s contention that one of the greatest dangers in our time is the “monopoly of our imagination.” Bowing before an idol, Brueggemann argues, is fundamentally a matter of “yielding the imagination” so that the world is experienced and interpreted in terms established by the idol. Consequently, “the key pathology of our time, which seduces us all, is the reduction of our imagination so that we are too numbed, satiated, and co-opted to do serious imaginative work.”*

What might be possible if we cultivated imagination? I don't mean the kind of imagination that dreams up the next reality TV show. I am not talking about imaginative ways to do what everyone else is doing. Imagination ought to lead to one-of-a-kind insights and creative new ways of thinking. Set aside some time to do some serious imaginative work.

*Brian J. Walsh and Sylvia C. Keesmaat, Colossians Remixed: Subverting the Empire. (Downers Grove, InterVarsity Press, 2004), 141.