A Prayer for Today

Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,
My one desire is to live a thankful life.
You have rescued me, blessed me, healed me, redeemed me.

Selah

I desire to live this life in gratitude to you.
I desire to find my place in Your will.
I desire to fulfill the role to which you are calling me.
There is a place into which I uniquely and perfectly fit.

I aspire to get as close as possible to that spot.
Forgive me when I fall.
Forgive me when I fail.
Forgive me when I stray from that perfect place.

Selah

I will trust You and allow you to guide my path into that way.
I will trust You.
Lead me into Your perfect will.

Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, amen.

(a contemporary prayer by Keith Shields modeled after ancient Celtic prayers)

Thanksgiving

Give Thanks - He is Worthy

(also posted at the website of Bow Valley Christian Church)

Thanksgiving season is a time when we examine the gifts we have been given and remind ourselves that we are not "self-made." Douglas Wilson writes,                                                                                                 

The issue of thanksgiving is really central to the whole debate about the existence of God. On the one hand, if there is no God, there is no need to thank anyone. We are here as the result of a long chain of impersonal processes, grinding their way down to our brief moment in time. If there is a God, then every breath, every moment, every sight and sound, is a sheer unadulterated gift. And, as our mothers taught us, when someone gives you presents like this, the only appropriate response is to thank them.[1]

A God who exists and created the universe is a worthy recipient for our thanksgiving. To whom does the atheist turn to give thanks? If there is no God, there is no thanksgiving. Oh sure, you could thank your forefathers and foremothers for outrunning the predators so that they survived long enough to reproduce and ultimately brought you into this world. But that would be hollow thanks. When we give thanks, there is always someone to whom it is given and the receiver must be worthy of our thanks.

I am glad to know the God who deserves our thanks. He is the one who has given us the gifts we have in this life. It is to Him that we respond.

Rev. 4:11 'You are worthy, O Lord our God,to receive glory and honor and power.For you created everything,and it is for your pleasure that they exist and were created.'

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[1](Wilson and Hitchens 2009) Introduction to the book Is Christianity Good For the World: A Debate, Christopher Hitchens and Douglas Wilson

Narcissism, Entitlement, and Gratitude

I just finished reading The Narcissism Epidemic by Jean M. Twenge and W. Keith Campbell. It is a good description of our present culture backed up with plenty of sociological studies. The following quotes are examples of how Twenge and Campbell convince the reader that we need to be concerned about narcissism in North America.

Enron – the company made up of "the smartest guys in the room" that cooked its books and subsequently imploded – is a microcosm of the downfalls of narcissism. As Malcolm Gladwell argues in his essay "The Talent Myth," "Enron was the Narcissistic Corporation – a company that took more credit for success than was legitimate, that did not acknowledge responsibility for its failures, that shrewdly sold the rest of us on its genius." Gladwell argues that creating a great organization involves cultivating great teams of individuals who can work well together – not just individual superstars. This is yet another reason narcissists are often not very successful in the long run: they would rather take all the glory for themselves than share it with a team.1

The idea that girls should start looking sexy at five – or even earlier – has entered the mainstream. It needs to exit. You can now buy high heels for newborn babies.2

In business, entitlement often boils down to an equation: less work for more pay. Plenty of workers today want that, but they also want more flexibility, balance, meaning, and praise for their work. . . . That would be fine if they were willing to work for it. However, the number of Americans who embrace the idea of working hard has steadily declined. One study found that fewer employees in 1999 (vs. 1974) agreed that "A worker should feel a sense of pride in his work" or that working hard made them "feel more worthwhile and [like] a better person." The 1999 employees were also less likely to agree that "A worker should do a decent job whether or not his supervisor is around."3

They present much more evidence to suggest that we are living in a world of excessive narcissism and entitlement. Fortunately, the last section of the book is devoted to prognosis and treatment. They suggest that

One of the best ways to combat entitlement is to be grateful for what you already have. In one fascinating study, people were asked to list all the things they were grateful for once a week for ten weeks. Compared to a group of people who did not do this task, those who thought about everything they were thankful for reported a greater sense of well-being, enjoyed better health, and exercised more. They were also more emotionally supportive to others. Gratitude is the opposite of entitlement: you think about what you already have, instead of what you deserve to have but don't.4

The book makes a great pitch for something that the Bible (Colossians 3:15, 4:2, and Hebrews 12:28), our parents, and common sense have told us before, live a thankful life and you will be happier and better liked. Why wait for Thanksgiving? Perhaps we could all start right now to list the things for which we are grateful. How different might your life be if you set out to list all the things for which you were grateful once a week for ten weeks or more?

The authors of the book point out that part of the remedy for narcissism is humility. I might also add that a remedy for narcissism is to humbly recognize that we are all broken and in need of being fixed. None of us can claim to have it all together. We know too well the dark corners of our lives which need improvement.

Charlie Peacock's song "In The Light" (most famously recorded by DC Talk) is a reminder of my own brokenness, my need for others, and in particular, my need for a saviour.

"In The Light"
(Music and Lyrics by Charlie Peacock)

I keep trying to find a life
On my own, apart from You
I am the king of excuses
I've got one for every selfish thing I do

What's going on inside of me?
I despise my own behavior
This only serves to confirm my suspicions
That I'm still a man in need of a Savior

I wanna be in the Light
As You are in the Light
I wanna shine like the stars in the heavens
Oh, Lord be my Light and be my salvation
Cause all I want is to be in the Light
All I want is to be in the Light

The disease of self runs through my blood
It's a cancer fatal to my soul
Every attempt on my behalf has failed
To bring this sickness under control

Tell me, what's going on inside of me?
I despise my own behavior
This only serves to confirm my suspicions
That I'm still a man in need of a Savior

I wanna be in the Light
As You are in the Light
I wanna shine like the stars in the heavens
Oh, Lord be my Light and be my salvation
Cause all I want is to be in the Light
All I want is to be in the Light

Honesty becomes me
(There's nothing left to lose)
The secrets that did run me
(In Your presence are defused)
Pride has no position
(And riches have no worth)
The fame that once did cover me
(Has been sentenced to this Earth)
Has been sentenced to this Earth

Tell me, what's going on inside of me?
I despise my own behavior
This only serves to confirm my suspicions
That I'm still a man in need of a Savior

I wanna be in the Light
As You are in the Light
I wanna shine like the stars in the heavens
Oh, Lord be my Light and be my salvation
Cause all I want is to be in the Light
All I want is to be in the Light.

1 (Twenge and Campbell 2010, 45)
2 (Twenge and Campbell 2010, 158)
3 (Twenge and Campbell 2010, 235, 236)
4 (Twenge and Campbell 2010, 241)

Works Cited:
Twenge, Jean M, and W. Keith Campbell. The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement. New York: Free Press, A Division of Simon and Schuster, Inc, 2010.

Our Time

Once we begin to think about our place in time and geography, the mystery of where we happen to exist is great. Think of all of the other points in time we might have been born. I was born in the latter half of the 20th century; but, I could just as easily have been one of the many people born at the beginning of the 20th century, or in the 5th century of the current era, or 2000 years before the current era. I might have also been born in the year 3000 of the current era, if our world should happen to last that long.

Then, there is the mystery of where I was born. I am one of the fortunate ones to have been born in a wealthy country of the 20th century. It was not a wealthy country in the 5th century but, when I happened to come along, Canada was one of the greatest countries on the planet. The good fortune of living in a country with modern medicine, plentiful food, and clean drinking water is certainly something about which to be grateful. The mystery of how this happens is astonishing.

The reality is that all of us have arrived in the middle of the story. We appear at a time and a place that has been shaped by countless lives that have gone before us. We could not choose the kind of world into which we were born and there are limits on how much we can affect it now that we are here. We are in the middle chapters. It is not the beginning of the book; nor is it yet the end. Each of us finds our place in this story. Some of us work hard to find our place and make our mark. Others are content to drift with the tide of time and place.

Some of the lives that have come before us have been obscure and did little to shape this time and place. Others have put a permanent mark on the world as we know it. What mark will you leave upon this planet? What is your perception of the degree to which you want to shape the world? Each of us indeed has a choice. No one is requiring us to change the world. Yet each of us has the ability to do just that. There is a principle in the book of Esther which proposes that we may have been placed in our current circumstances for a reason. This principle suggests that all of us have choices that we can freely make. When opportunities to act come our way, we may choose to do nothing while others act and have an effect on the circumstances of the day; or we may choose to see the opportunity as something for which we are uniquely prepared and choose to act with resolve. Esther 4:14 can be paraphrased, "If you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance will arise from another place; but who knows but that you have come to your position for such a time as this?"

The Thankfulness of "Why Me?"

My friend Phil Reinders at Squinch reminded me of a great statement by G.K. Chesterton: "Here ends another day, during which I have had eyes, ears, hands and the great world around me. Tomorrow begins another day. Why am I allowed two?" Phil's blog reminds us that we must ask the "Why me?" question in good times as well as tragic times. I often find myself asking the questions, “How did I win the lottery of being born in Canada rather than Haiti?" "Why did I get to live in the family I did with two good parents who loved me?" I have seen enough drug-addicted single parent situations (that cannot even be called family) to know that I might have been born into one such as that. Yes, these are just as difficult "why me?" questions. G.K. Chesterton asks why he is allowed two but when I do the math I can count more than 18,000 days in which I have had eyes, ears, hands, and much more.

I lost a good friend to cancer a year and a half ago. He was about 56 years old at the time; by today's standards, too young to die. A few years before that I had a miraculous experience with the disappearance of a mass on the pons of my brain. Why did my friend die while I carried on living? These are important questions that will never be fully answered this side of heaven. But I still ask these questions and as I ask them I lift up a silent prayer of thanksgiving to the One who has made me with eyes, and ears, and hands, and a healthy pons, and with the ability to ask the "why me?" question in good times and in bad. In this season of Thanksgiving, my desire is to live a truly thankful life.

Twenty Six Haircuts

When Maureen and I moved to Vancouver we were intentional about looking for local shops at which to do our business. Since Historic Chinatown is close we have purchased our car insurance at Jack Chow insurance, we sometimes buy fresh produce at the Keefer Street Chinatown Supermarket, and I get my haircut at Second Beauty Salon on Main Street. I have previously blogged about the amazing life of the woman who has now been cutting my hair since we moved here. You can reread her story here. Today I am thinking about how thankful I am that I took the chance to walk into that shop over three years ago.

There is always a certain amount of apprehension about first time cross-cultural experiences. I remember walking into the salon for the first time and wondering if I would be able to understand the accent of the person cutting my hair. I wondered if they would be able to understand what I was asking for in a haircut or would I come out with a different hairstyle than I had planned. But the cultural risk was certainly worth it. It allowed me to meet this amazing woman with her real life story of escaping from China in the 1970s. As I spoke with her yesterday I discovered that I had misunderstood some of the story of her escape. But correcting the details of the story only serve to make her story more amazing.

I previously reported that "she swam from China to Hong Kong with two sisters and two brothers." But the true story is that her seven siblings had all escaped before she did. Through a series of attempts, all of her brothers and sisters were already out of the country by the time she made her escape. They had all hired boats to take them across the narrow channel to escape. Some had to make multiple attempts and some spent time in jail for trying to escape. Being the youngest in her family, Becky*, was left behind and was alone with her parents by the time she made her escape. She swam for ten hours across shark-infested waters with one friend. The portion of the channel at which they swam had oyster beds on the bottom of the sea. They had to keep their legs up as they swam for fear of cutting themselves on the razor-sharp shells. Becky often speaks of how "lucky" she was. Her friend did get badly cut by the oyster beds during the long swim. When they arrived  in Hong Kong some farmers came to their aid and took them to the hospital to treat her friend's legs. Becky had been lucky because someone had given her two pairs of pants and she wore both pairs while she swam and this protected her from any cuts. For several years, when she returned to China to visit her mother, she would go to visit those farmers and thank them for rescuing her and her friend. She told me that all of those farmers have now passed away because of the long period of time that has passed. Becky also says that when she thinks back to this time in her life she can hardly believe she did this. She realizes what a proficient swimmer she was back then. She jokes that she could have probably qualified for the Olympics.

After her friend had been treated at the hospital the Hong Kong police gave them a bit of money and told them to go downtown and get a bus. They spent the first few months after their escape living with relatives. Becky also considers this very lucky for she says that within about three or four years of her escape the policy changed and Hong Kong began sending all escapees back to China. There, they would be thrown in jail for their crime. Sometimes the parents of the escapees would also be jailed.

As she finished cutting my hair I thanked Becky for the haircut and for telling me her story. I told her that I always learn things from her. I am thankful that I took the chance of getting a haircut in Chinatown.

*"Becky" is not her real name.