Fork in the Road

"Stay on the path that the Lord your God has commanded you to follow. Then you will live long and prosperous lives in the land you are about to enter and occupy." Deuteronomy 5:33 (NLT)

"There's a fork in the road but you never take it."[1]

It may depend upon our perspective or it may depend upon our character, but some would look at life and see it as a number of forks in the road, and choices we must make, as we navigate the one lifetime we have been given. Robert Frost is known for writing,

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.[2]

The complete stanza says,

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.[3]

Frost was often asked about the “sigh” in this poem and he was always enigmatic about it. What was the difference made? Was the difference a good difference or a bad difference? Perhaps it was an unknown difference.

A fork in the road, on the path of life, offers opportunities, choices, responsibilities, and temptations. In the movie,  A Wonderful Life, George Bailey has many opportunities and forks in his road. His choice at each one is a choice made out of loyalty. He chooses to serve the banking business his father started; he chooses to serve his brother; he chooses to serve the poor; he chooses to serve his town; and just when it looks like all of his choices will lead to suicide or prison, we find that he has chosen correctly and that he has also served his family.

Jayber Crow, the fictional barber in Wendell Berry’s book by the same name, has this to say about his path.

Now I have had most of the life I am going to have, and I can see what it has been. I can remember those early years when it seemed to me I was cut completely adrift, and times when, looking back at the earlier times, it seemed I had been wandering in the dark woods of error. But now it looks to me as though I was following a path that was laid out for me, unbroken, and maybe even as straight as possible, from one end to the other, and I have this feeling, which never leaves me anymore, that I have been led. I will leave you to judge the truth of that for yourself . . . there is no proof.[4]

There is no proof, and yet, there is always faith. There is no proof, and yet, there is always trust. You will have to judge the truth of that for yourself.

Works Cited:

Berry, Wendell. Jayber Crow: The Life Story of Jayber Crow, Barber, of the Port William Membership. Berkeley: Counterpoint, 2000.

Cuddy, Jim. Skyscraper Soul, "Watch Yourself Go Down," 2011 

Frost, Robert. The Road Not Taken. 2015. http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/173536 (accessed 04 11, 2016).

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[1] Jim Cuddy; "Watch Yourself Go Down"; Skyscraper Soul, 2011.

[2] (Frost 2015)

[3] (Frost 2015)
[4] (Berry 2000)

Stages of Life

“I know better by now than to try to predict what is to come. But of all of the stages of my life – Goforth, Squires Landing, The Good Shepherd; Pigeonville, Lexington, Port William – this one here on the riverbank bids fair to be the last. Unless of course I fall and break something or become an emergency of some other kind, and give up the ghost finally in front of the institutional TV set down at Hargrave. Who knows?”[1]

Chapter 27 of Wendell Berry’s Jayber Crow tells the story of Jayber moving from his life as the village barber to taking up residence in a “little camp house” along the river. From his “public life” to the commencement of “a private one.” As he moves, he reminisces about his life and its stages by referring to the places he had lived.

It got me thinking about the stages of my own life and the places I have lived. I wrote a list of all the places I could remember that I had lived. It wasn’t a long list and it was a good exercise for me. It occurred to me that the stages of my life did not always change with the location in which I lived. Sometimes it was just a move. Other times it was a paradigm shift in my way of life. I am a farmer’s son who helped with many a carpentry, mechanical, or veterinary task. I am the science nerd who created experiments to diagnose genetic disorders using the latest DNA technologies in a clinical laboratory. I have lived in one of the most densely populated portions of Vancouver and I have lived where there was a full section of land between us and our neighbours. I am a son, a husband, a father, and a grandfather. I am a pastor, church planter, teacher, and administrator. I am the generalist who knows something about many topics. I have spent time regretting that I have not learned enough in one specific area and I have rejoiced in the fact that God has given me a good mind with which to understand the world. I have spoken with people who were at the top of their field of science, philosophy, education, theology, entertainment, and financial investment. I have spoken with people who suffered abuse and who went on to harm others and spend a good portion of their life in prison. I have seen people healed of their diseases and I have watched friends die at a young age.

Much like the character of Jayber Crow, I would say that “Some of the changes in my life were imposed, and some were chosen. . . And each change has been a birth, each having taken me to a new life from which I could not go back.”[2] I have often wondered what would have happened if there were other impositions or other choices along the way. “But of course I have no answer.”[3]

Works Cited:

Berry, Wendell. Jayber Crow. Berkeley: Counterpoint, 2000.

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[1] Berry, Wendell, Jayber Crow, p. 299.

[2] Berry, Wendell, Jayber Crow, p. 299.

[3] Berry, Wendell, Jayber Crow, p. 299.

Poor Sermon on a Pretty Day

“In general, I weathered even the worst sermons pretty well. They had the great virtue of causing my mind to wander. Some of the best things I have ever thought of I have thought of during bad sermons. Or I would look out the windows. In winter, when the windows were closed, the church seemed to admit the light strictly on its own terms, as if uneasy about the frank sunshine of this benighted world. In summer, when the sashes were raised, I watched with a great, eager pleasure the town and the fields beyond, the clouds, the trees, the movements of the air—but then the sermons would seem more improbable. I have always loved a window, especially an open one.”1

Wendell Berry is a masterful writer. In one paragraph he captures a wealth of emotions and several insights into the human predicament. It is as if the first-person-speaker represents several church-attendees in a few sentences. First there is the preacher who, despite his best efforts, has delivered a poor sermon. Does he know he is delivering a bad sermon? Can he see it on the faces of the people in the seats; in the eyes that wander or close; in the rustle of pages and shifting of Sunday clothes? Next there is the person whose mind is wandering to other thoughts and other places. What is it that has contributed to these "best things [they] have ever thought?" Is it the preacher; the quiet atmosphere of the church building; or the songs that have been sung? Finally, there is the person who unabashedly stares out the window and observes the creation. Is this person tuned into God or wholly disconnected? Neither the preacher nor the reader knows the answer to these questions. It is as God says in Jeremiah 17:10, "But I, the LORD, search all hearts and examine secret motives. I give all people their due rewards, according to what their actions deserve." May God be gracious with a greater measure of grace than we have given.

              Long Sermon (Brad Paisley)

    They've read the scripture, they've passed the plate
    And we're both prayin', he don't preach late
    But he's gettin' "Amens", and that's just our luck
    Yeah, it's eighty-five degrees outside and he's just gettin' warmed up

    Oh you and me, we could be soakin' up that sun
    Findin' out just how fast your brother's boat'll run
    I tell you there ain't nothin' that'll test your faith
    Like a long sermon on a pretty Sunday

    Well it's been rainin' all week long
    I woke up this mornin', the dark clouds were gone
    We've both been raised not to miss church
    But on a day like today heaven knows how much it hurts

    'Cause you and me, we could be soakin' up that sun
    Findin' out just how fast your brother's boat'll run
    I tell you there ain't nothin' that'll test your faith
    Like a long sermon on a pretty Sunday

    See that sunlight shinin' through that stained glass
    How much longer is this gonna last

    Yeah, you and me, we could be soakin' up that sun
    Findin' out just how fast your brother's boat'll run
    I tell you there ain't nothin' that'll test your faith
    Like a long sermon on a pretty Sunday
    Like a long sermon on a pretty Sunday

    Brad Paisley and Tim Nichols; Published by Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner/Chappell Music, Inc.

1. Jayber Crow, Wendel Berry, p.

Loving Our Enemies

In his brilliant novel, Jayber Crow, Wendell Berry creates a particular scene to illustrate a point. Jayber Crow, who is narrating his own story, is the town barber and, as is the lot of a small-town barber, hears many conversations in his barber shop. Some of these conversations are entertaining, amusing, and educational. Others are just plain ignorant. He recounts the following interaction with Troy Chatham.

The war protesters had started making a stir, and the talk in my shop ran pretty much against them. Troy hated them. As his way was, he loved hearing himself say bad things about them.

One Saturday evening, while Troy was waiting his turn in the chair, the subject was started and Troy said – it was about the third thing said – “They ought to round up every one of them sons of bitches and put them right in front of the damned communists, and then whoever killed who, it would be all to the good.”

There was a little pause after that. Nobody wanted to try to top it. . . .

It was hard to do, but I quit cutting hair and looked at Troy. I said, “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you.”

Troy jerked his head up and widened his eyes at me. “Where did you get that crap?”

I said, “Jesus Christ.”

And Troy said, “Oh.”

It would have been a great moment in the history of Christianity, except that I did not love Troy.[1]

How easy it is to love our enemies in the abstract. It is difficult to love actual people.

Works Cited

Berry, Wendell. Jayber Crow. Berkeley: Counterpoint, 2000.

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[1] (Berry 2000, 287)

The Problem With Quotes

Anyone who has read this blog for any length of time will know that I rely heavily upon the writings and sayings of others. I frequently use the words that another has said or written as a jumping off point for exploring my own thoughts. Most of the time, I am confident that this is a fruitful method. Yet, I am also aware of the pitfalls of such an approach and have often witnessed problems with this technique in the writings of others; and so I know that it must also exist in mine. The basic difficulty lies in the fact that by taking one small snippet of a writer's thoughts, we run the risk of missing their meaning and perhaps interpreting their words in the opposite sense in which they were intended. For example, if one searches for quotes written by Wendell Berry in his book, Jayber Crow, you will find, online, a preponderance of quotes which support pessimism toward God or toward his existence. Here is an example of an often used quote that, at first glance, suggests that Berry is a proponent of atheism:

"Well, for instance," I said, "if Jesus said for us to love our enemies - and He did say that, didn't He? - how can it ever be right to kill our enemies?  And if He said not to pray in public, how come we're all the time praying in public?  And if Jesus' own prayer in the garden wasn't granted, what is there for us to pray, except 'thy will be done,' which there's no use praying because it will be done anyhow?" . . . He said, "Have you any more?"

"Well, for instance," I said, for it had just occurred to me, "suppose you prayed for something and you got it, how do you know how you got it?  How do you know you didn't get it because you were going to get it whether you prayed for it or not?  So how do you know it does any good to pray?  You would need proof, wouldn't you?"

He nodded.

"But there's no way to get any proof."

He shook his head.  We looked at each other.

He said, "Do you have any answers?"

"No," I said. . . . You have been given questions to which you cannot be given answers.  You will have to live them out - perhaps a little at a time."

"And how long is that going to take?"

"I don't know.  As long as you live, perhaps."

"That could be a long time."

"I will tell you a further mystery," he said.  "It may take longer."[1]

The questions Wendell Berry's character, Jayber Crow, asks are typical of one who has had faith and then lost it. They suggest someone who is trying hard to believe in Jesus, but just can't do it. For those who like to draw quotes from Wendell Berry to suggest agnosticism, this is sufficient to prove their point that, it is not rational to believe in a God who answers prayer and interacts with His creation.

Jayber Crow says these words at a point that is one sixth of the way through the book. One has to go a full two-thirds of the way through the book to see the answer Jayber Crow gives himself. The answer, which shows a renewed faith in Jesus, goes like this:

"I finally knew... why Christ's prayer in the garden could not be granted. He had been seeded and birthed into human flesh. He was one of us. Once He had become mortal, He could not become immortal except by dying. That He prayed the prayer at all showed how human He was. That He knew it could not be granted showed his divinity; that He prayed it anyhow showed His mortality, His mortal love of life that His death made immortal. . . .  

If God loves the world, might that not be proved in my own love for it? I prayed to know in my heart His love for the world, and this was my most prideful, foolish, and dangerous prayer. It was my step into the abyss. As soon as I prayed it, I knew that I would die. I knew the old wrong and the death that lay in the world. Just as a good man would not coerce the love of his wife, God does not coerce the love of His human creatures, not for Himself or for the world or for another. To allow that love to exist fully and freely, He must allow it not to exist at all. His love is suffering. It is our freedom and His sorrow. To love the world as much even as I could love it would be suffering also, for I would fail. And yet all the good I know is in this, that a man might so love this world that it would break his heart."[2] 

These are the words of a man who has found a renewal of his faith. These are the words of someone who will trust Jesus. The point is, one must consider the whole body of work before concluding the position of the author on this particular issue. One small, or large, quote does not fully represent the beliefs of Jayber Crow or, by extension, the beliefs of Wendell Berry. The bottom line, for both writers and readers, is that we must not be lazy about investigating the thoughts of an author. Truly substantiating a point may require a good deal more reading than most of us choose to invest. Becoming true scholars, knowledgeable readers, and connoisseurs of words will require a good deal more outlay of time; but, as good scholars will know, the investment is worth the reward.

Works Cited:

Berry, Wendell. Jayber Crow. Berkeley: Counterpoint, 2000.

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[1] (Berry 2000, 53, 54)

[2] (Berry 2000, 253, 254)

The Mercy of the World

“The mercy of the world is you don't know what's going to happen.” ― Wendell Berry, Jayber Crow

As children, and then young adults, we start out into this world without a very good sense of who we are. The older we get, the more we realize our capacities, our strengths, our weaknesses, our gifts from God, and the things that we will never accomplish. If I had known from the start the gifts I would be given, I might have set out to take advantage of those abilities and might not have attempted some other things. I would have been a lesser man for taking that approach; for we learn our true weight in the world by testing our legs. One cannot truly learn that they are good at something until they try, practise, and perfect that ability. Conversely, one does not learn their weaknesses and disabilities without a good number of attempts and failures.

Despite our questions, insecurities, curiosities, and frustrations, God has given us a good gift in not allowing us to know our futures. "When the trumpet of the Lord shall sound, and time shall be no more" we will look back over our lives with an eye to how the story was woven together from its many balls of yarn. We will see the smooth and harmonious colours of the ordered portions of our lives and we will see the snarls, loose loops, broken strands, and clashing colours of the places along the way in which we made small and large mistakes - and the times when the horror of the world impinged upon the fabric of life. Then, we will know how much we have been blessed, the true nature of our work will be understood, and we will appreciate the full grace of the One who holds all of the fabrics together in the tapestry of a collected community.